“There were no good old days”

This blog may contain R rated imagery or language. No one under 18 admitted.
Cops about to bash protesters in the politically charged atmos of NZ in the 80s. All set to pop hits from the era. Pt Chev school rocks out the craziest production ever seen! The PacMan eating the dots dance was legend

Cops about to bash protesters in the politically charged atmos of NZ in the 80s. All set to pop hits from the era. Pt Chev school rocks out the craziest production ever seen! The PacMan eating the dots dance was legend

The NZFC wanted photographic proof of my work at Toronto. Well this was a hell of a lot of work.

The NZFC wanted photographic proof of my work at Toronto. Well this was a hell of a lot of work.

Team Turbo may have found their villain.  #ironside @jasoneisener  @evanhusney

Team Turbo may have found their villain. #ironside @jasoneisener @evanhusney

The Apple bank is now open for business

The Apple bank is now open for business

Director Park in the house. He loved his ABCS OF DEATH blu #bigscreennz

Director Park in the house. He loved his ABCS OF DEATH blu #bigscreennz

Twas an unfortunate accident of circumstance that befell wee Vincent.

Twas an unfortunate accident of circumstance that befell wee Vincent.

What I paid to see MY NAME IS NOBODY.

What I paid to see MY NAME IS NOBODY.

Mr Smiley

Mr Smiley

Goblin rehearsing SUSPIRIA at Civic. Show Fri 9.15pm

Goblin rehearsing SUSPIRIA at Civic. Show Fri 9.15pm

The real Garth Marenghi

The real Garth Marenghi

My portrait as drawn by Michel Gondry.  He captured most of my flaws with a single line!

My portrait as drawn by Michel Gondry. He captured most of my flaws with a single line!

Scariest ending since Sleepaway Camp

Scariest ending since Sleepaway Camp

Jason: The Early Years

Jason: The Early Years

AN INVITATION TO DEATH

To Whom It May Concern

You are cordially invited to the New Zealand Premiere of THE ABCs OF DEATH, a feature film I produced with Tim League of Austin, Texas and Magnolia Pictures NYC. The film screens in The Mighty Civic Theatre on Sat April 20th, 10pm as part of the Autumn Season of the New Zealand International Film Festival. By the way, when I say ‘cordially invited’, I mean buy a ticket to the event and support my premiere.

The production of this global anthology of death was born from an innocent place; the alphabet books of my dear sweet children. The production spanned 15 countries and features new work from 26 talented genre filmmakers. The end result is something the NY Times said was "Refreshingly original" while Salon Magazine added that it was _”Enormously Impressive” _before the Austin Chronicle concluded that it _”Soars to artistic heights and such tasteless depths”. _

So before you even begin with the excuses about it not being your type of film or you’re too busy. Just stop right there. Over the past decades I’ve happily;

  • Attended an exhibition of your horrible outsider art that looks like the work of a very earnest but narcissistic 4yr old.

  • Bought tickets to your one-person play about the rocky relationship you had with your mother.

  • Come and listened to your lame band do Blind Lemon covers at venues that had bingo the night before.

  • Brought the party to your snobbish kid’s birthday every year even though I easily could have politely bowed out after their 7th.

  • Read your inane pop-culture blog and replied in the comments just so you feel assured that you’re adding your unique voice to the world.

  • Supported your cafe/eatery regularly even though I hate your dry humorless approach to food and your insistence of putting up our mutual friends horrible outsider art on your walls.

  • Listened to your endless ideas for movies that will never move beyond your lips to become reality. They appear to exist only to drill through my earwax and shrill my cerebellum into submission.

And hundreds of other frustrating and infuriating events/ questions that I attended or replied to, because even though I’d rather do anything else, I feel an obligation to support you because we have a personal connection of sorts.

And yes I do understand your hesitancy about attending my night of nights, I mean we all know The Family Movie Guide of America labelled the film "The Worst, Most Perverted Film Of All Time" _and Variety Magazine, known as the industry’s bible could only muster one word _"Appalling".

So when you’re deciding what to do this Saturday in Auckland (& Wellington on the 25th), remember me at your opening/ exhibit/ blog etc and realise that the polite beatific smile I wore actually masked pain and discomfort.

Remember….. I did that for you.

So here’s to us at the NZ premiere of THE ABCs OF DEATH, let’s raise a drink to all those sacrifices we make in being a true friend.

SCREENING The Civic - April 20, 10pm Tickets - http://www.the-edge.co.nz/abcsofdeath.aspx

Thursday April 25 - 8:15pm Paramount, Wellington

Trailer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFgrFENQ4oQ

**Website ** http://www.magnetreleasing.com/theabcsofdeath/

Look out its Fatty Krueger.

Look out its Fatty Krueger.